I’m Meagan Kirby-McDowell, and for over half of my life, I’ve struggled with anorexia and depression. While I’m better than I used to be, I still battle the same thoughts that have plagued my brain since I was a teenager. In this blog, I want to explore that, explain what it was like being anorexic, what the recovery process entailed, and talk about how depression still affects me. I want people who are struggling with an eating disorder themselves to know they’re not alone because I felt that way for years. I’m here, and I know exactly the fight you face every day. By going into detail about my experiences, I want family and friends of an eating disorder patient to get a better grasp as to what their loved one is battling because they can’t do it alone.
After my dad and I wrote a story for CNN in February 2018 about our experiences with my eating disorder, I knew I wanted to write more but wasn’t sure which direction to go. Shortly before my 30th birthday, I decided to start a blog. I’m finally utilizing my college degree! Throughout 2019 I worked to make it happen, with a lot of help from my ever-supportive family, and here it is – A Thin Line Recovery. I choose that name because I will deal with these mental health issues for the rest of my life. I walk that thin line between a good day when I’m confident and those “ED thoughts” don’t enter my mind and bad days when anorexia whispers in my ear and depression makes me want to curl up on the couch.
In the midst of my recovery, my dad asked me to promise him something; that no matter what I did with my life, I would help others. I was unsure how I would do that, but I like to think that with this blog, I’m finally fulfilling that promise.
Recovery is worth the fight.
